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After Party

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11 Comments

SFTinman

I lost my heart to this euphoria called Tina. I was a divorcee virgin to IT when I wanted to be popular in the gay scene. It was a sad sacrifice when I lost my 27yr sobriety to this wonder drug. During my 5yr reign of terror, I walked the line of risking my career, housing & HIV status. In the end, I lost friends & 3 significant others. I've been clean 2yrs now but I still feel heartless. And no matter how much sexual absolution I embrace, I still feel I'm running in those damn poppy fields.

May 5, 2016 SF Bay Area/East Bay

Old Guard

I'm almost 60. I only used when I wanted uninhibited hardcore sex. I've never felt included in most gay things. However, having sites to hook up with others allowed me to at least have sex of some kind. I tried 12 steps. I can't relate to them as I used only several times a year, not daily. 12 steps is a blanket solution. I've therapy and know the root of the problem. Stop the sites & triggers. All I wanted from meetings was fellowship/friends. It's not happening with 12 steps in my face

April 10, 2016 Indianapolis, IN

PostPartier

I wrote a short story on my introduction to Tina, several years ago. Fortunately, I managed to avoid addiction by having my curiosity satisfied, more than anything else. Like Crumpler stated, what drew me to the scene was the participants sharing the party favors. They are the gym rats, and the tattooed hunks that you see in gay porn. They're the elite executives and upscale career-oriented men that, for the most part, maintain their lifestyle doing this discretely on the weekends.

April 9, 2016 Long Beach, CA

Bipolar Bear

I'm clean 189 day. Self help, phone calls, not the best model, but I make it work. Aging with HIV, mental illness, staying clean and finding friends outside of the fellowship of the rings, who can't talk to someone they don't know about, in fear they are using, OMG are we not segregated enough. 20-25% of HIV+ diagnosed chronic depression-mental illness, of that # 50% struggle with addiction. 50% are over 55. Widen the fellowship is my message, along with other modalities of recovery exist.

April 7, 2016 Tri-State Area

Jeffrey

Totally relate to this article. I started meth when I lived in NYC after I found out my fiancé was cheating on me. Turned to manhunt and met a man who offered me meth. 10 years of using I finally got clean over 2 years again via inpatient rehab for 8 months. HAD TO CHANGE EVERYTHING. I do have HIV and Body Dysmorphia (old motorcycle injury). Meth and the sex made EVERYTHING seem ok. Love the healthy gay mentoring concept. Maybe it's not too late to help in that direction. Recovery is possible!

April 6, 2016 Cleveland, OH

Ridehigh

I'm very lucky to be 2 and half years sober from crystal now, and can totally relate to all the experiences discussed here, including the fact when I decided my life was at rock bottom and needed to turn around that I abstained from sex for almost 2 years to stay from the triggers. The entire 5 years I was addicted I always told myself I was in control, working long hours - partying all weekend then midweek partying as well....I look back now and am blessed I had family who didn't turn away!

April 6, 2016

JamesMon

Meth is a Push drug lowers inhibitions make a person braver somewhat like a Dr.Jekyll and Mr Hyde , it can take a person to a limit of sexual perversion beyond it's normal appetite ! and make you lower you expectations...so if your Bi Curious or have no luck with a opposite sex over time Meth can pervert your taste in partnerships !

April 6, 2016 California

Die to

I can very much relate to the story about Crystal Meth. I stopped using in 2005 at the age of 45 but recently used again. Using once this past month was just a reminder why I don't like to use.Sure sex was fine , but realize sex and life is much better than having a drug take over your emotions .The side effects of lack of sleep, the stress on the body ,the disruption of eating etc is not worth the use of using. Know at age 56 sex is fine . Libido abit low but with fitness , diet , i m happy.

April 5, 2016 Vancouver , Canada

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