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Is it stigma to not want to be sexually involved with HIV positive people? Silly me, I thought that was called the exercise of one's "personal choice." I've seen no U=U 4 ME as a push back to U=U for all messaging. As a gay man I'll do anything I can to help people living with HIV except have any kind of sex with them. Perhaps U=U is true I avoid all sex now and HIV+ men in particular since a HIV+ liar can kill you. No sex lets me never worry about HIV at all a price I pay!
The longer I live with this virus, the more convinced I become that “disclosure” is a scam. We can sit here and go on about stigma until we’re red in the face. But honestly ask yourself-how would you feel if someone announced to you “hey, I have herpes. You’ve probably got a dormant version already, most people do. Please be rational and don’t judge”? The point of these norms and laws is to isolate us. Focus should be in these awful rules, not on the people who react as intended.
When it comes to dealing with others perception of HIV, I follow the saying "Never apologize, never explain." The author may be sabotaging his efforts because hook-up apps are unforgiving and impersonal.
Enlightning. Being poz since February 1980, I have been a lucky survivor. I Have heard about stigma for many years and could not relate. Sure I have been open about my status on social media, and sure I have been rejected for it; I also have had to explain... but never consider it stigma. To me it was just that the individual either did not know the facts, did not realize that it can be hurtful and accepted with respect their decision. Is that stigma? To me it is not.
Spare me the fake nobility, PaulRussell. People without HIV infection are “undectable” too. So, it seems that all undetectability isn’t equal. What is to be done with stigma to get rid of it? Stigmatize it? How ugly is that irony?
Mr. TXKieth, I bow to your word count economy. Prudently illustrating the ugly, pervasive stigma taxed upon Poz individuals. Noble warriors who choose life unencumbered. Living positive, healthy journeys. Priceless legacies that is LIVING with HIV. I choose to own me. You don't. You will not with your cynical, bargain basement sarcasm. Undetectable isn't a euphemism. Undetectable is a truth. To live. Love. And laugh spiritually and transparently debt free. Paul Russell
Is “undetectable” now the new euphemism for being HIV positive? “I’m dying from undetectable.”
MisterQueerly
The most common offenders are so-called "mature" gay men who should know better but their brains are frozen in 1985. Most of these same men live w/ wives or in sexless relationships they have been in for years and are clearly bored w hubby. Their gay lives are lived on the down low or their wives just stay w/ them for security, not sex. There is a certain hook-up site that does not even include HIV status as part of its basic profile details. Many of its members are closet cases. Pathetic.
February 1, 2022 • Los Angeles