If you find me roaming the streets like a zombie, babbling about Sarah Palin and FOX news, then please help me if you can. Approach me slowly -- no quick movements, please -- and gently stroke my arm while saying “it’s okay, it’s okay.” Then gently remove my wallet from my back pocket. Please return me to the address you find on my driver’s license. My boyfriend will hopefull know what to do then.
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