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I totally agree, with your blog I just read, but in the same instant, I no longer am caught up by what the rest of the world says about a black man. The daily struggle of any man is very difficult, but I find that the daily struggle of a black man, is most difficult, because of the fact that black men are strong minded and strong willed, and have survived the most impossible odds. It should not be a surprise to us as black men, with the terms and conditions of life for it, we have always had a hard time here in America, and being a black gay man is even more difficult, I guess what I am trying to say is this, Black men have feeling, we have desires and we have dreams, but the true fact of the notion is this simple. Our dreams seems to be unimportant and in my opinion, white America, do or does what ever it takes to destroy the dreams of Black men in America, so when the black man is on the downlow, he has desire he has dreams, but he has also had his world torned upside down, just trying to do the right thing. A man can only take so much before he breaks, so I say that Brothers on the downlow, they have no where to turn or no one to talk to. We shoot each other down and have so much mistrust, so why would they disclosed what they are truly feeling? Downlow is deeper than living two different lives, it living in a world where everything you do is looked upon with a frown. So Yes Brothers, we need to talk,but also, we need to look at the past and look at history, the Black man was mainly used for breeding, and sexual content in slavery. That mental abuse and sexual abuse has now had the affect of me accepting who they are. So Histroy plays an important role in our lives as Blackmen. Thanky YOU Brutal
Aundaray Demonizing men of color and their sexuality is nothing new. I am dissapointed by the race double standards. Thank you for writing this though it was painful.
content with where I am
Interesting comment. I appreciate the article it was well written and I understand your points. Please hear mine. In the dark ages of 19 years ago I found out my husband of 14 years at that time was bisexual, essentially living a double life. I educated, so I thought, knew nothing of the life. We had 4 beautiful children, lived in a middle classes life and I was afforded many benefits that most might not have. Imagine me finding out that my husband is going to get a test for "AIDS", the year fall 1989. Why that test first if you are not feeling well? I was at a lost. Yes it was positive, and to my greater surprise so was I. Lost confused and depressed, I began planning for who was to take care of our 4 children soon to be orphans. My husband died in 1991 not long after diagnosis. I've been left putting together pieces for a long time. I'm comfortable with saying I still love that man, he is the father of 4 well accomplished children. Not a day goes by that they don't miss dad. IF the word Downlow was around, I might have began to understand and know what was going on... there were plenty signs, I just missed them. Running to the bathroom at resturants, signs with the fingers on the face.. you know them. I didn't. I'm not angry now, I feel the term will educate non suspecting women and put them on alert. For those of you who don't like the word, think about women like me who have been deeply affected. There are others, in the days of support groups formed just to talk about it privately, I met them. Had he come to terms with himself, we might have worked this out and he and I could have safely been protected. Don't take offense to the word,it's unfortunate that it is associated with Black men, we all know the reasons for that, however, it might and I'm sure it has educated many and maybe just maybe saved one life.
May 21, 2011