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I have had many bareback encounters in my past life with prostitutes. One day, i caught like the biggest f++king flu ever, which would not go away like for months. I was educated about what that could possibly mean, and I had planned to go get tested 3 months after my most recent risk contact, but in the meantime there was a witch hunt in the tabloids, someone was accused (and later convicted) of not disclosing. That was when I decided not to get tested, so there wouldnt be any leverage against me. Again, i mostly had bareback sex with prostitutes, they know the danger involved, i've always known, and it NEVER EVER crossed my mind to prosecute that last prostitute that in my mind got me infected, because I KNEW ABOUT THE DANGER. No one in his right mind has to be told nowadays about sleeping with persons you dont know if they are poz or not. But there are many a++holes that like to blame others instead of themselves and like to sue, so thats why i did not take the test for two and a half years. Finally I went because I had repeteadly been so sick, I couldnt take it anymore. Guess what, turns out im negative after all!
Why do you think having an intimate partner will pass it to them? It's not hard to avoid transmitting it. Why would you do that to yourself?
My lover of 10 years lied to me about his status .When i first meet him i decided i wonted to be with only one person that was the best protection and safe sex . I was tested neg 1990 and i asked if he had been tested he said yes in the arm forces and it was neg in1988 .for 10 years he hid hisHIV issues not taking any medication , because i am a nurse and he knew that i would know thatthe meds were for. one sat he came in the er where i was working witha nose bleed that would not stop , his plaltets were life threating low . then that when i found out that he had been pos sence 1888. he informed me that he also gave me the HIV infection that was in his blood many times over the years in my drinks and on my food . I asked him why he looked me in the eyes and stated because {i did not wont to be alone !!}. i thought that if you had it you would not leave me !!!!. that worked out well for him , i left work and packed me stuff and left !!!. It is still very hard to think about , Ive Not had sex with anyone 12 years i will not pass what he gave me to another person it will die with me !!! are you wondering if it changed my life Hell yes!! am i still mad hell yes !! at myself mostly i have been pos for 22 years and i will try for another 22.
I have been positive since 1987, I was raped in high school by a teacher who was a predator. In the beginning I was ashamed and afraid, and also angry. There were no laws then, and I let my anger control my dic%, and never told anyone. When I was able to deal with the fact that I was going to live, I knew I had to make changes in my life. I now disclose my HIV status when I meet them, if I believe that we are going to have sex. I have been doing this since the 90's. If you are in a bookstore, or bathhouse, you need to realize that ... people who go to them are infected, and with possibly even worse than HIV. It is a matter of respect, do you respect yourself? I have decided to create an HIV Disclosure Contract, and make sure that the person that you are going to be with understands that you are protecting both of your interests if you are going to play. This will help in the event of he said/he said..or whatever you are in to..Just be honest, it makes life so much easier when dealing with the HIV thing.. This is my opinion, and I happen to believe it is a good one...Take care of you, and the ones you care about..
With this disease there will always be the argument of 'stigma' and 'criminalization' To disclose or not to disclose is a personal matter. Let's face it. The biggest fear with this disease is that people with hiv are 'contagious'. Education will only go so far to the most ignorant people. Everybody now know the rules of HIV. This is not new anymore. Until there is a cure I don't see and end to any of this ongoing feud. I have had this disease long enough and bonded with other hiv 'peoples' to compare. "WHATCH OUT WHO YOU TELL. IT MAY COME BACK TO BITE YOU EVEN IF YOU WERE DISCLOSING IN GOOD FAITH."
Paul Hanson
I am really shocked hearing that story.
January 5, 2013