Nelson: Mr. President, this is Nelson Mandela.
George: Señor Mandela! Buenos días.
George: Uh, cómo está stuff en la Panama?
Nelson: The pandemic? Their endless going must leave an emptiness with those of us who stay behind. As you say, a charge to keep.
George: Oh, it’s Nellie! You old fortune cookie. What’s the Swahili for “how you doing?”
Nelson: Mr. President, I’m calling to inform you that South Africa’s president, Thabo Mbeki, has accepted the link between HIV and AIDS…
George: It’s like terrorism and death! America and peace! You know, uh, I got Bill Fritzy, I mean, Frist, down there to see about a downpayment on that $15 billion I promised. I’m thinking maybe Africa just needs $2 billion for now. I got five years, right? Yeah, maybe you need a little less.
Nelson: Mr. President, when I divorced my darling Winnie, I said, “I part from my wife with no recriminations. I embrace her with all the love and affection I have nursed for her inside and outside prison…”
George: You were in prison? What were you in for?
Nelson: ...So I am saying that in the face of the grave threat posed by HIV/AIDS, we have to rise above our differences and combine our efforts to save our people.
George: That’s right. We will not allow terrorists to threaten the African peoples. The price of vigilance is eternal freedom. And that AIDS thing is serious. Those people oughta get that checked out. Take something and get that cleared up. Sheesh. I gotta go, Nellie. I’ll catch up with you next year when you need the next check.
Nelson: But please—no more collect calls.