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Last year i discovered the man id been seeing for 1yr was hiv+ /taking meds making him undetectable. Im now on Truvada. 2yrs into the relationship, i discover that hes been online seeking bareback sex from men, groups of men, women who want to bring their boyfriends or husbands along, and rarely just a woman to do drugs, cross dress &engage in risky sex. Emails in the hundreds. 1 email he admits to meeting with a group of men for sex and drugs weekly. Im terrified.
I personally don't like condoms but I would never have sex without them unless it's in a committed relationship with someone i've been tested with. I'm sure raw sex is the best sex but I bet a clean bill of health feels even better. While I think it's unfortunate he contracted HIV from that heartless person who didn't bother to apologize we have to take personal accountability for our sexual health
Some people become gleeful over PrEP AND condom failures for the same reason some people (including many of the formerly negative) are gleeful about being more superficially attractive, "fit" or wealthier than some other random Joe. Humans naturally abhor dis-empowerment and the gay hookup scene is almost exclusively about taking from others for personal gain, whether physical or psychological. It is a pathological lifestyle on a mental level so it's not surprising that it manifests physically.
Really did anyone bother to check the facts? Yep he got infected by a rare drug resistant strain of HIV but PrEP is the way forward. Nobody likes condoms, and we all throw caution to the wind now and again...and said I'll never do that again! The finger pointing brigade helps no one. They are just jealous of some guys willing to play with the odds well in their favor. UD guys and PrEP guys I think are the ones in complete control, with the most knowledge and best aware of their current health.
I don't understand the gleeful "told you so" attitude of so many here. ONE person got HIV (he was undetectable within 3 months, and is doing fine). Meanwhile, tens of thousands of people are using PrEP and *not* getting HIV. PrEP is resoundingly successful from a public health perspective. Every medication or vaccine has failures. But 100% minus 1 does not equal 0. Condoms are not magic charms. People still get HIV using them. No one shames them for not using PrEP too, which would be safest.
The other thing is, Prep is absolutely worthless in preventing Syphillis infections or Hepatitis infections or chlamydia, gonorrhea, herpes, HPV, Zika infections etc. Granted, none of these are HIV, but they can impact health quite seriously. Condoms help prevent infections against most STDs and in that way are far superior to Prep. Plus they have no toxicity. I can understand the rational of Prep with a condom for super safely but Prep without a condom makes no sense.
I had problems with condoms initially. I would lose my erection immediately. But using them while alone helped, I was able to get past this and it was no longer a big deal. Still, I remember friends mocking my resolve to always use condoms... like I was some kind of neurotic. Now, many of these guys are + and some of them have very serious health issues as a result. I know first hand that HIV is nothing like type 2 diabetes which can respond well to diet and exercise alone.
Faboo
All I can say is that I'm glad my days of needing to be bothered with any of these concerns. I was a slut in my youth, but never a dumb slut like some of these PrEP abusers. If you refuse to learn from others' mistakes and modify your behavior, you'll just have to learn the hard way. Sad so many died if HIV before you, and you just thumb your nose at what they suffered. Pathetic.
February 8, 2021