The following is my recipe for perfect chicken soup. The salt may harden your arteries, but you’ll die with a smile on your face.

Ingredients:

1 lean chicken, cut into quarters
2 medium sized white onions, diced
4 cloves garlic
2 large carrots, sliced
5 stalks of celery
3 medium to large potatoes, diced
1 chicken bullion cube
12 or so bay leaves
2 tbsp black pepper corns
a generous amount of chopped parsley
salt and pepper to taste
1 good friend
1 bottle red wine
1 large bag of Chitos

Instructions:

1. Drink the wine with your friend.
2. Saute the onions in two or three tablespoons of oil until soft.
3. Throw everything in the pot except the Cheetos, potatoes, parsely and friend. Add water to cover.
4. Make love to your intoxicated friend, or walk the dog if your friend is too buzzed. .
5. After 30 minutes, add the potatoes.
6. Simmer for an hour or so. When it?s tender, remove the chicken skin and bones. If you are too hungry to wait, eat the Cheetos.
7. Add the parsley and stir..
8. Eat.