The Follow Up...
He did however give me a tongue lashing for stopping my depression medication. But he said since I had only stopped it a few days ago that I should continue taking it. Of course, I whined about all the other pills I was taking but he was not trying to hear it. He told me that I need to keep taking it because at this point, I probably don’t have enough of the medication in my body yet for it to help with the depression. And if I don’t keep taking it more than likely I will bottom out and be back in the hospital again. I guess like my Daddy said, I have a bit of lawyer in me because I tried to argue my case anyway. My response was, “Ok, if I have to take the medicine do I still have to spill my guts to a therapist?” He then went on to say that I don’t have a problem talking to him. I wanted to say, “Well, duh, you’re my doctor, why should I have a problem talking to you?” But I didn’t want to come across as a smart ass. And if you can’t talk to your doctor then who can you talk to other than a priest? It wasn’t like I had anything to confess and even if I did, I don’t think a few Hail Marys and an Act of Contrition would make things right as rain. I would rather have my primary just give me prescriptions for the medication instead of laying on a couch. I just don’t think talking to a therapist who doesn’t have a clue what it means to be poz is going to help me much. I mean what can this person say to me? That they understand how I feel when I know damn well that they don’t. I don’t take kindly to being patronized and that’s how I would take it if they said it which would lead me to getting up and walking out. I would rather do what I have been doing and talking to those who read my blog and posting in the forums. At least I know the people who read my blog can relate and I get more support from those in the forums than any therapist could ever give me.
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