Since my last blog entry, the tears have finally dried up. It’s probably because I have shed so many there’s nothing left to shed. Tomorrow is Thanksgiving and I will be spending it with my oldest sister who happens to live upstairs from me. My other sister will probably show up as well. I just pray she doesn’t bring her alcoholic boyfriend with her. Whenever he shows up, it’s bound to be drama. I will plaster on a fake smile, maybe even a Joker smile. By the end of the evening my face will probably hurt. I will go through the motions of pretending nothing is wrong. I would never give them the satisfaction of knowing that anything is bothering me. It is the only time of year besides Christmas where my dysfunctional family makes the attempt to act like we care about each other. My thoughts will be about my father, the past Thanksgivings we shared with each other and how much I miss him. And I will even make the attempt to be grateful. I will then go on to try to get over the next miserable holiday.....Christmas.......BAH HUMBUG and all that.

And on a final note, I wish to thank those that left me comments. It really meant a lot to me to see that other people can relate to what I am feeling and going through. Your words have given me reason to try to get through the muck that I call life. Though I still feel hopeless, I will still be around.